8/3/25 - Giving myself space in friendships
I ended up going to bed at like 10pm yday but then woke back up at 12am, and then couldn’t sleep until 4am.
Ended up waking up at 12pm, read a storytelling book for a bit, where it basically said that each character needs to go through a whole arch.
Was fasting today, so ate fasting food, watched TV for a bit with mom, came back to my room and took a nap.
I had one mission today and that was to do my vlog voiceover. I was getting really stressed about it and basically doing everything in my power to procrastinate at this point. But somehow woke up and just felt like I wanted to type out everything I wanted to say first. In the past, I would take my journals and would tell chat gpt to write me a script. I just felt like my personality got lost in that. My favorite was the random voiceover I did, but the problem with that is that it find of felt all over the place. It didn’t feel like a proper story.
So I wrote the whole script in my voice and was like tonight I’ll record it in my voice too and just use it as a flow. Nothing needs to be proper.
Mom ended up coming on my walk with me for most of it but then she came back home and I went on my usual route.
After I came home, chilled with mom for a bit, and then went back into my room and finally recorded my voiceover. Now, i need to edit it.
Overall, I just hate how it feels like so much work. This isn’t sustainable for me. I need to find an effortless flow with things or I drop it.
I hope I get obsessed tonight and edit my whole vlog. Have those moments occasionally.
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On another note though, I decided I was kind of going to have a break with all my friendships. I still haven’t answered my best friend. My guy friend also facetimed. My SF friend also facetimed.
Idk I just need a reset to just trust whoever is meant for me will always stay with me.
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Also getting annoyed with facial hair and need a long-term solution for it.
7/10 - Chill day but was having anxiety for my vlog
Intuition - It’s good to have an energetic break sometimes
Energy:
25% - procrastinating
25% - doing my vlog
25% - thinking about doing my vlog
25% - chilling
