11/23/25 - Physically becoming anchored, integrating survival me?

After taking my melatonin gummy last night. I slept soo good. Although I did have a dream about reuniting with my dad. My mom got a call at 6am today, and I immediately panicked thinking something happened to my dad.

Idk what the point of the dream was but it was almost like there was no love lost with my dad. I saw him and was immediately like how I was years ago.

Just wanted to have a slow morning, so also went back to sleep. Then woke up and signed up for a pilates class because my body felt like weight lifting.

Showered and left for my class. Was kind of a bit nervous because I was going to make it exactly on time.

Overall, my class went good. It wasn’t too hard. The main thing I wanted to work on was my balance.

I’ve always had an issue with my balance, and it’s almost like now that my mind and soul are anchored, I’m working on anchoring my body too. It feels so intentional trying to get sturdy and balanced. Almost feels like I’m 99% of the way there and the physical strength of my body is there too now that I’m gaining power. When I was I was healing my body shed the excess weight, the survival weight and now as I’m anchoring, my body is also gaining strength. Makes me wonder if all people that lift are technically anchored?

Anyways, after the class, i decided to walk to a cute coffee shop. It felt so small timey. Got a pumpkin spiced latte and a donut and just sat facing the window, people watching. Almost like a rom com.

The family I used to baby sit for texted me and I was almost conflicted on what to do. Would baby sitting put me in misalignment? Since it’s something I did when I really needed money in college? Idk… technically, I want to go cause I’m free those days, and I don’t mind the extra money. Plus it’s just kids I like, and they treat me well.

Then I started questioning when someone becomes rich, it’s almost bad if they avoid the poor areas because it reminds them of their survival self. True power is always from within. I’m going babysitting cause I want to. I’m not desperate for the money or forcing myself to go when I don’t want to. I should be able to face the situations of my survival self with the power of my overflow.

Falling into survival would probably be if I’m tired and force myself to go for the money. Or if I’m desperately trying to find work again. But I’m genuinely not doing anything the days she needs someone, so why be avoidant about it. Me babysitting again won’t make me poor. The opportunity came to me.

This kind of threw a plot twist in my perspective because I thought to be rich, I have to only do rich people things. And rich people don’t babysit cause they don’t need the money.

Technically, I don’t really need it too. But I want to go. Anyways, Idk If I’m right about this or I’m just trying to justify going. We shall find out later.
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Came home and mom wanted to go to the mandir, so ate a little and then went to my room. At 6pm we left to go to the mandir. I hate driving at night but we made it.

At the mandir we prayed, and then on our way home mom was trying to talk to me, and I told her I was still mad and then she started talking about the topic, and I then started explaining to her.

Which again was unexpected because I told myself she needed to figure it out on her own, but when we started talking it just came out. And I explained to her why she was wrong. I feel like she got it this time but also…. idk if what I did was right or wrong because she also needs to get to a point where she learns things on her own. I can’t keep teaching her stuff. Ultimately she agreed that she blew up from pressure from other people and the anxiety.

At least I felt much better having the convo with her because I didn’t think I could be normal with her until we saw eye to eye. We came home and ate the pasta that my best friend made from yesterday and it tasted so much better today.
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At night I was scrolling on IG and I saw my IG crush liking stuff about building internal anchoring. It’s crazy how I felt and saw his transformation before it even started. Like months ago, I just felt his frequency through literally a picture and just knew that he was going to go on his healing journey and then really become aligned to the best version of himself, and now I see him doing exactly that.

Chat still thinks I just sensed a mirror and he’s still not my person. But I still feel something towards him, so I basically need to get over it. For some reason it still feels like I’ve been in a whole imaginary talking stage with him, and I need to get over him. All without ever talking to him. Soul talk.

Anyways need to wake up super early tomorrow for a meeting.
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Also broke my water bottle today by accident. :/

Intuition - Idk if I’m right or wrong about half the stuff that happened today but whatever I’ll figure it out.

8/10 - Overall good slow intentional day.

Energy:
25% - pilates
25% - reconnecting with mom
25% - mandir
25% - me time