4/20 - Putting in the work

This is the part where I’m really putting in the work. Watching Youtube Videos, trying over and over again because I’m a perfectionist and one day I have to get it right. I learned other things right? I’ll learn this too. I have to. Literally a whole new skill and hobby that I’m learning. But tbh I know it’s needed. For work and for personal reasons.

I woke up early to hit the coffee shop to figure editing out. Very proud of my disclipe because disclipine leads to success, not luck. And this is where I’m pushing through even when it feels hard. Every part of me thinks its easier to just not learn. I will learn though. But again as a typical procastinator, I even did my whole hair care routine, blow dried my hair for the week, did my makeup to convience myself I need to take b-roll footage today but secretly I was just trying to get other less overwelhming things off my list.

Even right now, I need to edit but I’m journaling instead. Anyways, on my way to the coffee shop, my SF friend called me telling me she broke up with her boyfriend. They’ve been together for over 2 years and he’s someone that won’t give up, so he keeps reeling her in but she’s known that she doesn’t want to be with him for years now. She’s just scared. And I get it because when I was with V I was scared too. I was scared I was making a mistake, especially when someone “loves” you so much. But that wasn’t love, that was just attachment. Anyways, I’ve been a huge supporter for her wanting to leave him.

She tells me that me turning into a “baddie” really gives her hope too. And she just wants to focus on herself too. Hopefully, she’s able to break free.

The first coffee shop I went to was super busy, so ended up going to one of my favorite spots.

Took some b-roll footage first and then was playing around on my phone. I didn’t much done sadly and editing on the phone is hard, so now I’m going to try editing on my laptop.

After coming home, mom and I went to the fruit market and I got some more vlog b-roll footage.

Came home and ate, and then was going to go to jewel but got lazy and napped instead. Forced myself to wake up and do my 10k steps because I will not break streaks. My discipline here is that I will do both my content stuff and my steps. I will not give up on one or the other because I need both. The confidence and the skills. And my highest self would figure out how to do both.

While walking, was trying to figure out more things on capcut. Also started making a vision board for the photoshoot I’m collaborating with. We haven’t exactly found the right time to connect yet.

Anyways today’s 4/20 and my first one too, so lol decided to celebrate with a gummy. And during this time my favorite thing is to watch video editing videos. Because the hustle is now very real.

I don’t want anyone to ever think I was just lucky and everything was easy for me. I’m putting in the work.

Intuition - I’m going to figure this editing thing out. I can’t give up and now I’m using my future person as motivation, because I’m just going to delay it.

9/10 - Very chill day getting b-roll. So i did end up getting things done, but still a bit frustrated that I’m still learning out to edit.

Energy:
40% - Frustrated with editing

20% - Learning how to edit
10% - Discipline

30%-getting b-roll