9/13 - Feeling god’s presence

A couple of days ago I was feeling disconnected from God. I just wasn’t feeling his presence. I felt like he wasn’t listening to me.

But today, after reflecting, throughout this whole experience, I felt God’s presence more than anything. I truly never felt alone, in the most loneliest time period of my life. I literally felt like God was next to me the whole time. I felt power in the Ganpati Murti I was clenching. And all this has to be a miracle, it has to say something.

There’s no way that I didn’t feel lonely when I actually was alone if God wasn’t with me.

And suddenly, I feel his presence literally next to me. He is listening to me. He is with me. I am still lucky. And I know he is watching over me.

All my life I thought I couldn’t deal with something happening to my mom without the support of a man in my life. I thought I would be too lonely, and god proved that wrong too. If anything this was truly the least loneliest i ever felt.

God literally gave me strength when I thought I had none, proved to me he is literally next to me, and that I don’t ever need anyone to take care of my mom.

My mom’s surgery today went well and I’m continuing to pray there are no complications, she has a smooth recovery, and she makes it home safe.

Even in one of the hardest days of my life, today felt like a 8.5/10 because god and the universe were on my side. And this feeling is what I need to remember even when I’m feeling disconnected to god.