8/27 - Having unshakable delulu faith
I did end up having a crying session yesterday, but it had nothing to do with me feeling hurt or missing anyone. I just had a moment where I just lacked trust in the universe. I questioned if I was just being delusional and if things were ever going to work out for me. I was having a moment of vulnerability and weakness and honestly, I think it was needed. As mentioned before, healing is never just up, it’s always ups and downs. And last night was just my down.
Today, I woke up and felt even more numb. I wanted to do nothing but confine in my bed and sleep. And that’s exactly what I did.
I slept so much that I was actually tired of sleeping. So overall I would say the day started off as a 6/10, just because although I was sad, I also was appreciative that my life was still functioning, my mom and I were healthy, so yeah my positivity levels weren’t at an all-time high, but things could be worse.
After taking some time to reflect, I realized this all happened after I met up with a friend of mine. Her negativity on life was just too much that it rubbed off on me a bit. I started to question if my intuition and blind faith in the universe was a diaster for success, if me just relying on the universe was giving up on my dreams. How if things were actually going to work out for me or if I was just going to live a life filled with dissatisfaction.
So, today’s lesson learned was, the people who surround you during your healing journey do matter. Negative energy can impede your healing.
It wasn’t until later today where I was like whatever… I’m honestly just going to have unshakeable faith in the universe. It HAS always worked out for me until now, so why would I lose trust now? Being scared, negative, and just anxious isn’t going to get me anywhere.
I rather be delulu, positive, and just reframe every bad experience into a lesson. So here’s to affirming my affirmations a little harder today.
I AM LUCKY. EVERYTHING DOES ALWAYS WORK OUT FOR ME. THE UNIVERSE DOES HAVE MY BACK. WHAT’S MEANT FOR ME WILL NEVER MISS ME. EVERYTHING DOES ALIGN WITH WHAT I WANT IN THE LONG RUN. THINGS ARE IN PROGRESS AS WE SPEAK. I AM WORTHY. I AM ME. I AM BLESSED. I AM POWERFUL. I AM MAGNETIC. I AM LOVED.
