1/28/26 - Staying centered through pivots
Woke up today feeling in between. Not frustrated, but not at complete peace either.
Made my bed, went to shower, and then this aunty from our community called and sent over a picture of a guy that’s interested in me. My mom showed me his photo, and for once in my life, I said no right away without feeling guilty.
That feels like a huge turning point for me, and I’m sooo sooo proud of myself.
Old me would have maybe entertained it a little bit because I’m never superficial like that. I would have tried reading into him to see if maybe he could be my person or if it could work. And would have put a “possible connection” above. Similar to what I did with that other arrange guy in the summer.
Today, it was plain and simple. Does he look like my dream person? No. Okay move on.
There was no maybe I could fall in love with him. Maybe he is nice under it all. This time, from this one picture. Did I feel met? No.
If this was my last shot at being single, would I be happy/feel lucky or still searching? Still searching.
So it’s a no. There is no trying to get to know him. I know myself and I know that if I tried, I could love anyone because I can read and meet anyone where they are.
I’m not looking to meet anymore people where they are. I’m looking to meet people who meet me where I am.
And old me would feel so guilty or wonder about the “what ifs” and still keep an invisible string. This time it was a clear no, no guilt, no what ifs.
I think old me was scared that what if this is the best I can get now. This me is only answering one question, “Is he my person?”.
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It’s also kind of iconic that this happened after I gave my mom a whole lecture yesterday.
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Anyways, the rest of the day I worked on assets for my campaign. I was preparing as much as I could, so I would have to do the least amount tomorrow and everything would be good to hand off. As expected, the Drybar lady never emailed back. Smh. I was kind of over the frustration, though.
Felt very stimulated still, so I ended up taking a nap. After I woke up from the nap, I decided to send myself the gift card to try out the process. That’s when I saw that the gift card I would get is for participating locations. Did a bit more research and found out that a lot of Drybar locations don’t even take the gift card since they’re independently owned.
I had two options. To stick with drybar and let people figure out what locations they could use on their own OR find something else. At first, I was a bit overwhelmed that if I did something else I would have to redo all the copy and stuff.
Decided to walk and that’s when I started looking into Ulta. I could technically keep everything the same since Ulta does blowouts too, and just switch the branding from Drybar to Ulta. If anything, the Ulta gift card would be sooo much more useful since they could use it on anything, compared to the inconvenience of Drybar now. It also makes sense why the lady was being so wishy-washy.
I went back to working and made a second version of the typeform and asset drafts really quickly, so it’s all under control.
Part of me thinks I really saved myself from just kind of double-checking. It wouldn’t have been the biggest deal and technically I would have still been right, but just an inconvenience for people, so I feel like the universe really saved me.
Idk what to do tomorrow, I’ll have my designer make both the Drybar and Ulta graphics. On one hand I feel super married to the Drybar idea, and on the other Ulta is just so much better too. Also a way bigger brand, so I don’t necessarily feel like I’m downgrading my idea or compromising. It’s just the attachment I had to the Drybar idea. That’s what my team is expecting. This is also why I don’t like telling people what I’m working on because I usually have to pivot so many times, and telling people just creates expectations out of me.
Made some noodles and salmon for dinner, and got the rest of my steps in. Watched an episode of Tell me Lies.
Overall, I do feel at peace and don’t feel anxious about my campaign. I’m already prepared, and gave myself Friday as a free day in case I do need to make any changes, so I don’t feel urgency or anything. I also already accepted it’s not going to be an official collaboration anymore but I’m still not compromising on any aspect of it. If anything, whatever the end result is, I’m happier with it. It’s way more controlled.
I think I’m leaning more towards Ulta now, but we’ll see. I’ll let my gut decide tomorrow.
I also ordered groceries from Walmart delivery for the first time. Survival me thought it was a waste of money to pay extra to get groceries delivered. Now me, is like, at least I don’t have to be drained spending an hour picking out my own groceries. Spending $5 more seems so worth it to be able to stay home and protect my peace.
Also on the other hand, I feel like Chat no longer gives me satisfactory answers.
9/10 - I’m proud of myself for the way I handled things today, with the guy and even all these work pivots. I was calm, collected and working from stimulation not urgency.
Intuition - Maybe doing Ulta tomorrow
Energy:
100% - working
